old terrors old lusts old despairs begone
i wear the ring Sidney gave her diamonds not
a girl’s bestie 3 large 14 small set in platinum
it was a promissory note for her soul
then he went back to his pregnant wife for the
birth of their 5th badcad was never gonna marry her
he was a joker a racetrack habitué an unholyfool
she believed him like the humans holding up their
little crosses against the devil wearing garlic against
the vampire (old terrors old lusts old despairs)
William Faulkner As I Lay Dying 1930
she called her mother from the phonebooth on
Overbrook St. send me train fare i gotta get outta here
now newly married to Lee +very pregnant with me
the ring a talisman protecting me from the truth? which
so far has NOT set me free ..stupidity is honest +
straightforward (Mr. Dostoyevsky) truth is not (Ms. AAC)
mother now fully transformed into Venus she sits on the
western horizon the first+last star i discovered her when
i rose at 5:30 am for 22 days +raced up wretched Bathurst St.
to make her a nice covidbreakfast we two in N95s could
only see the whites of our eyes i peeled the fetid oranges
(Ape they have no taste epis) i poured the too hot teas
(my family makes the hottest tea!)
after mother died i took her to Curaçao where she hung outside
my window over a starstruck ocean no star as bright no star
with such style and style is character
(her’s haughty/innocent +oh so diva)
mirror mirror on the wall
who’s the fairest of them all?
I AM! hands down
now fuck you all
rollercoaster apocalypse calming down some but i’ll be damned
i still cannot find the pieces of me carved out on November 14th 2022
at 3:10 am but i’m getting closer
the truth is out there
__
Spring 2025 ..it takes 3-5 years to fully face the absence..and then some..
songanddancegirl 