songanddancegirl

leonard & me

(high school confidential / circa 1973)

(..it’s about those eyebrows..!) 

__

so  who did you think you were gonna be?  as you lay

on your unmade purple bed  writing prose  oh so purple

+juvenalia

Janis told Leonard (pre giving him head on an unmade bed)

she loved good looking men   but would make an exception

for him

 

Leonard serenaded me +my jazzloving family  in the TO burbs

endlessly  seems he wanted to be there with  Suzanne  a lady on

a river  with tea & oranges  from China

 

specifically  because  she was half-crazy

 

its kind of like the train that takes  whores & gamblers  he made

death sound ok too   +love  +lust   the wretched beast  untameable

until too late  i was thought of as a ladie’s man  but was alone 10,00 nights

 

we learned these lessons in the burbs  early on  lust a deadly sin   the Reap

a cousin  also from Montreal !  he pointed a bony finger at each of us children

you’re gonna die  you’re gonna die   +you’re gonna die 

 

you’re  ALL  gonna die  

(RIP  J Pecker) who outlived

his entire generation

 

besides visitations from death  our visitors  were  beautiful losers  lusty

buttonmen   kings   tailors  whores   hermaphrodites   +horse traders

et al.

it was a tempestuous household  where folk+rock  vied  with delta blues

+uptown jazzzz  where mother+father were known to heave suitcases at

one another   +the Count endlessly played   April In Paris

__

them were the days

..of miracles+wonder..

 

Fall 2026  ..one more once..(3:10)

..blacksonavitch..the 5th Beatle..

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ode to Christone

Christone Kingfish Ingram  Massey Hall  October 2026

27 years old  if he were a wind instrument  he would be

a sousaphone  planted himself beside an old bro at a recent

show  we stood inches from him  whiffing the scent of the blues

+Paco Rabanne

Christone stepped on my brother’s big toe  +he may never wash

it again  though i am quite certain it was already a stinkfoot digit

there is a singular seedy-scent that wafts off of this brother  he too

smells like the blues  but mixed with: wet dog+kasha flunken+goat

 

this a known aphrodisiac to his kind of chick  mid-60’s  borschty+

slightly mustachioed  this night was  his birthday  i whispered it to

the  BIG BLUES BOY  who lifted Horace onto his back   they were

last seen  lighting out for the territories ahead

Hore always wanted a bluesey son

Christo a mordant elderly father

HBD OLD HORE

__

Fall 2026

windy ressurrection

are we wind instruments? or wind bags?  we can often take

a wheeeezy final breath  we honk in certain situations  with

various bodyparts  so  do wind instruments take a final breath?

they honk quack groanmoan dental drill into your psyche  they

are known too to  pray  in breathy staccato

tut

tut

tut tut tut

honnnk

__

__

..sit so still you can hear your hair rustle..in the wind..

thirty one years old..

there are no prizes..

(Coming Through Slaughter

Michael Ondaatje 1976 + AAC 2026)

__

Fall 2026  ..where will you take your last gorgeous breath-honk?..

__

..preferably at The House of Blues..

hark! a dissonant honk🪿🪿🎷

crepuscule  haunting skies  girl on sax tongues the reed

early moonrise  breathy breathy high pitched crescendo

diminuendo in pink  oh the glistening damp pink  +now

out of left-field a HONK   a saxy man rising to inky-ejac

listen up jazzcats  y’all on the fast-track to jazz etoinity

__

Fall 2026  ..for Sonny Rollins aka Saxophone Colossus🎷🎷 1930-2026  RIP

(*Paul Gonsalves on sax)

bone up

you have to train for Death  like anything else

you cannot just let things happen to you  wake up!

put your high beams on   jettison hope+fear  as the

good  Shunryu Suzuki Roshi said: life is like a boat

that’s just about to sail out to sea  and sink

 

it is very hard to believe in our own death  when

our culture hides it from us  think immortality +

a nice Heaven  for the good  where you are still

kind of  alive!

the Buddhists say  cultivate bravery  abandon hope

brave people  are intimate  with fear  +this is where

courage comes in  so says Pema Chõdrõn 91  a buddhist

nun   Abbess of Gampo Abbey  Nova Scotia

 

and while you are easing yourselves out of life long death

anxiety  try coming alive!  perhaps for the first time  to the

glory of the fading moments of your one  wild+precious life

 

live Nirvana now  you can do it!  feel free to add to this list:

holding your firstborn child

holding your loved one’s hands

as they take their final breaths

the most peaceful breath in all of life

 

enjoy the love of:

music

art

books

lust  (yes a deadly sin..don’t believe em)

light  especially the crepuscule

trees

animals

birds

all sensory delights  be a proud sybarite!

soul  in every earthly manifestation

your body-house  (it’s not a fleshy machine fer chrissakes!)

 

relax into the groundlessness of human life  expect to

suffer  and you will not be disappointed  the whole of

life is about  change  uncertainty +holding the tensions

of the opposites

 

especially life+death   the Buddhists are telling me  this

will bring  some  peace   i’m going to try  believing  them

clawing at a fanciful immortality has only produced  more

clawing    and that is a fool’s game

__

 

Fall 2026  ..for the newlyweds..👑👑

 

 

 

 

 

a tad long essay on elevated evil

Hannah Arendt was right  evil is banal  when in the hands

of the  i was just following orders  crowd   the ordinary man

/woman /ape   orders to place trainloads of Jews  +others

deemed miscreant  into crematoria  constructed for this     sole purpose

in small hamlets  all over Eastern Europe:

Auschwitz-Birkenau

Bergen-Belsen

Buchenwald

Dachau

Flossenbűrg

Gross-Rosen

Mauthausen-Gusen

Neuengamme

Sachenhausen

Stutthoff

Belzec

Chelmno

Majdanek

Sobibor

Treblinka

oh you didn’t smell the acrid smoke of death in Spring?

elevated evil  is of a different sort  it is that which is perped

by a different crowd  currently by a man with orange skin

who sits on gold toilets +is about to livestream executions

tickets will be sold + Mel will bake snacks in her ovens

La Cosa Donald will take his place among the following list

of dybbuks  though thus far he has not reached their levels of

depravity  or shown himself to be this bloodthirsty  he has

however enriched the family coffers by approximately   $9.7 billion

 

Mao Zedong

Joe Stalin

Adolf Hitler

Genghis Khan

 

i was recently asked why it is that many Jews do not

consider themselves true citizens of the countries they

are born into +inhabit  the implication being that they

should

 

because it is

un-patriotic

un-Canadian

un-American

un-seemly

to do otherwise

 

in the case of Jews  the first shall be first  so listen up

the most highly accomplished assimilated Jews pre WWII

were the first at the oven doors  sadists haters +elevated evil

doers  know  that if you break the backs of the intelligentsia

 

of the rich+powerful in any group  first  it will be child’s play

to round up the dirty masses for showers   did you know that

the bones of children babies +family pets  were found behind

the walls of stolen Jewish homes?

 

on moving days  the new pillaging families were often greeted

by the scent of human decay: a putrid odor made up of over 800

organic compounds:

cadaverine  putrescine

skatole  hydrogen sulfide

et al.

the interlopers did not flinch  they just hauled in the rugs chandeliers

art of the dead  wore their furs  ate their porridge  slept in their beds

__

 

Fall 2026  ..trash of the mind  trash of the world  man is half trash..

( Kaddish  Allen Ginsberg  1961)

 

 

 

 

 

 

chopper’s on the way and i have a nice piece of land in the everglades for sale 🐊🐊

 

..tell me what it is you plan to do with your 

wild and precious life suffering? 

(Mary Oliver & AAC  The Summer Day  1990)

__

my wild+precious suffering  i was/am crushed by his cancer apocalypse

by theirs  who will navigate  who will walk beside them?  thru the

labyrinth  of hospitals  of charnel houses  thru the  shock  cutting  pain

 

where you are just

a number

with a tag on your

dirty big toe

 

i will

 

thru the  I.V.’s  shock  urine

pans  tubes  blood

+gifted funereal flowers

 

i will 

my hospital visits  all vigil+alchemy  trying to wrest you back from the

Gods  the price i pay is  élan vital   which of course is  not  replenishable

like the liver of Prometheus  holy saviour-comlexus + repetition-compulsion!

where the fuck is Hercules

when u need him?

where the chopper?

 

i once brought a giant

suitcase to Big Bro’s

hospice

in Florida

but they had a

take no prisoners policy

__

 

Fall 2026   ..sometimes saviour complexes..are really complex..

   

will you wear the yellow star for me?

you wear the keffiyeh after all   are you just a millennial poseur

making a fashion statement  with drink in hand?   or a true

humanitarian? if yes  then donning the star  will just be another

notch in your activista belt  no?

Babi Yar ravine Kyiv Ukraine  100,000 – 150,000  shot at

close range  by Nazis  September 1941   stripped of clothing

babies tossed in the air  above ready bayonets  Jewish blood

flowing  from the rivers to the sea   33,771 Jews  in 2 days

 

also psychiatric patients

homosexuals

Romani

Soviet prisoners of war

+ more Jews

how about the swastika? it’s  original meaning was  good fortune

+prosperity  in Sanskrit   i’m certain you are in favour of these

sentiments  but did you know that  real  terrorists wear the hate

rag?  with names like Osama bin Laden   ditto the Hamas apes

 

who on October 7, 2023  killed Jewish babies in their cribs  gang

raped  grandmothers  danced on graves  in rat infested tunnels

where cannibalism + rape  thrived   +family members were made

to watch

 

oh  you weren’t aware!  well maybe next time you get on your high

camel  horse  you will read the fine print  listen to the chants at the

Run for Palestine  Peace Rally:  From the River To The Sea 

Globalize The Intifada!  

 

and why do you think they hate me/us  so much? i did not commit the

blood libel  (!)  you know the one where Jewish people kidnap+murder

Christian children  +use their blood  for religious rituals  and baking

matzah  go ahead  Google it!

i simply spent my 35 yr career  in the trenches of humanity  working in

good faith  with your/our  abandoned raped starved +abused  children

c’mon  throw me a bone  will ya?

__

..No Dogs or Jews..Gentiles Only..

(signs found at Toronto public washrooms

+ beaches..1940’s)

__

Fall 5787  ..Happy New Year..🍯🍯🎉

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

u gonna weep for the weepin willow?

if a Salix falls in the forest  and no one is around

does it make a sound?  high-hubris of the man-ape

mastadon of trees mangled yesterday  freak hurricane

blew thru Kansas town  carnage on city streets  some

killed by baseball sized hail  some by slow decay  Salix

by pagan-hating sky gods

NOTHING remains  of my tree  but a sawdust covered

stump  ugliness of house it sheltered  revealed for all

to see  giant Salix made us all better  now beggard  by

it’s absence

willow  one of the sacred trees of the Wiccans  today

all lurid-moist  +sepulchral scent  of fetid tree-corpse

nostrils a-twitch  it was the lagniappe of life   in my

grey city    now what?

it’s like it was never there!  blankemptynegativespace

did human-minds create eternity? or was it already

there?  (dumbkopfs)  ditto a human life  after a time

it  will  be  like  you  were  never  here    dig it?

 

like the faded photos of

Katie & Lazarus

   

like the graves

of  Sarah & Joseph

who lay

in weed strewn

decay

 

or do they?

__

Fall 2026    Happy 5787!

🔴 🟡 ⚫️ 🟣 🔵 🟢 🟣 🟠 🖤 ☠️

the dot artist died today  at 97  checked herself into

an asylum 40 yrs. ago   started seeing dots   at 10 🔵⚫️🔴

Yayoi turned psychosis into immersive dot rooms

with names like: Let’s Live Forever!    (no thanks Yay)

Yayoi was sent to spy on her father  who had many

comfort women  stashed in rooms around Tokoyo

this wound of betrayal  the scent of feline on his hands

her mother’s rage  Yay’s hallucinations  dots + a Marian

Glinda  holy-glitter mother  with a magic wand

(every girl needs one)

a year ago today  tiny black dots (very Kusama) exploded

out of left eye  two weeks later out of right  sadly not the

start of this poet’s career as a Pop Art Queen 👑

no bitch! this a vitreous detachment extraordinaire  lights

flashing  still do  thought my 2nd alien abduction  1st at 10 🔴 🔵⚫️

when i also learned about men  feline scented+feral   one quite

cowboy-esque  not unlike husband #3

this did not cause me  dot-psychosis  just a lifetime in the

father-complex tent  where i scratched out tortured poems

(still do)  i was finally rescued by a Tony Curtis lookalike

i had his love-child too

__

…if Frank Stanford can kiss the black neck of  Sonny Liston

this poet can have  Stoney  Tony Curtis’ love-child.. 

__

..i wasn’t going to tell no one.. i kissed Sonny Liston

on his black neck.. (Battlefield Where The Moon Says

I Love You  Frank Stanford  1977)

Fall 2026 ..a put up yer dukes kinda summer..