"It's about words, and words are all I have…"

Archive for the month “May, 2022”

the oracle of ape

i have grown fond of telling people they will die

at 8 yrs. Jacques Cousteau Peckãr  oracled my death

as well as the deaths of everyone i knew  +would know


the Oracle of Jacques:

(while pointing at my little bros+i 😱

in a Montreal singsong)’re gonna die

and you’re gonna die

and you’re gonna die

we’re all gonna die


there were repercussions   oh yes there were

a lifetime of Schopenhauerian dementing  +

hollow eyes   (friends were few)


at Delphi  the Oracle was said to be stoned on

gasses  emanating from the bowels of inner earth

while i

have just

been stoned


deaf to protestations  + all prostrations  of the simple

kindly folk   who remonstrate +joke  oh ape lighten up

to them i say:   a monkeypox on u all


..concerned that i will forget who the enemy is

..concerned that there will be nothing to drink in hell

..concerned about dying but not about death

..i am exactly what i am supposed to be

(Charles Bukowski  The Damnation of Buk 1992)



Spring 2022 dammit! live! ..




something is stinkfoot

is meditation practising for death?  if yes

where do u go in those transcendent seconds?

u know  when the pause button is hit  on the



(there’s a mouthful)


but seriously  those seconds spent suspended  +drool

present but absent   absent-trajectory  dark side of the moon?

Oz?  where yet another snakeoil saviour awaits the escaping



a technicolour place  where 18 yr. olds  kill  6 yr. olds  for kicks

no wait  that’s here  so where is there?  overtherainbow nirvanablues

for yous little manimals    preening+licking   freshly vaxxed wounds


this morning i woke up

but the bed was EMPTY

has that ever happened to u?




Spring 2022  ..time to rise the fuckup America..

daddybird’sbird’s blues

it is his birthday today  when i saw him in the ICU

post heartthrob  +iced  my father on ice!  i learned

everything there was to know about life after bypass

+ventricle slash


i grew old that day


but hey  there is so much more to him than that

(say Aprill !! don’t leave the house for a week)

big muscles

chiselled cheekbones


big dogs


wild horses couldn’t drag me away  the last day  his birds

came  to carry him home  Lee swinging low  white horses

+chariot   the whole nine yards



Spring 2022   RIP LEE .. (May 21, 1921 – August 16, 1989)🏈

a girl can dream

i often wonder if my various mancrushes would

have liked me enough  to marry me   Al Purdy

Lebron  Steve Earle  (husband says he stinks

especially his beard)


Jack White (same husband says he’s too small

town for me!)  this husband: wildman  +lumberjack

family 1/2 Manitoba Metis  1/2 Scottish highlands



as a girl i mooned over Moondoggie + Mark the Rifleman’s

son  who my father took me to see circa 1963  father a

Paul Newman doppelgänger: wild  untameable  +jazz

who would want to tame the beast ??


well i guess a woman with 4 of his kids  who is equally

feral  (+Chanel)  i never did wonder if Zimmy would like me

he of the too rhymey poetry +the Nobel!  anyway  he looks

too much like the Rabbi of Gdansk   my anscestral town


Al Purdy on the other hand  BIG 200+lbs   prone to ecstasy

also infidelity  cheated on his wife with her bestie  married her

had a son  then returned to long-suffering wifey


Al Purdy  all cad+rugged   fuck u   Mr. Rough Hewn

__ feel this something surging inside you..this dragon..this incubus..  

(Al Purdy 1993)



Spring  2022   ..changing teams..just watch me..

Maharishi Madness

my swami is a middle-aged Jew  from the burbs

named Jeff  he is the best  bar none  no Ram Dass

no Maharishi


no  Jeff is local  homegrown+vildachya: yiddish for

a wild+crazyguy  he has many forms of mental health

issues    substance abuse too


Jeff fell from a tree at 23  broke-necked +resurrect

fastforward to a billionaire Calm-ish exec  with serious



Jeff is saving my soulhole from extinction  in these

covidtimes  soul-shred is on the rise  scurrying humans

with toiletpaper madness   make u want to puke


leaves one feeling a touch misanthrope   no?


on a micro-level  entering the final 3rd  suffering a

brother’s suffering   2yr cancer extravaganza   he

wasn’t heavy    except in the final moments


when nurse looked across the bed at me  and said: close

your eyes  just then the sheet on my side  ripped apart  in

the midst of lifting him    a deathbed meditation


now it’s time to  Rise The Fuck Up!  walk smartly into the

final 3rd  with panache  aplomb  +a well placed team of



who will have compassion for me  when i cannot



Spring 2022  ..Happy Birthday Martino!  May 19, 1946  ..76


when pigs fly

yesterday i walked in the local park  to view

the newly risen christ  cherryblossoms  in

these covidtimes the cherries have been

under police protection


not sure why? it’s our premier who looks

hungry enough to eat them  yesterday was

picture perfect  sun after 40 days of rain


it was fuckingbiblical  i tell you  BIBLICAL

a lone man sidled up (as per usual)  all

prickly-stubble  +serial killer


he said: the last time i was here i saw a man

walking a pig!  i ran  he had clearly just  slaughtered

a pig  in his basement  bunker


oh for satansakes  old+forsaken  now wandering

in a too pink  cherry purgatory  with one waxy-ear

+a bad case of doubt


does it get much better than this?


i have a neighbourwoman who lays in wait  she refers

to our local prostitute as: Miss Piggy  she who stands

daily  come sleet snow hail  fellows


i on the other hand high five Mildred  +regularly bring her

frankincense   surely i will not meet pigman  + mrs. kravitz

in heaven



Spring 2022  ..if pigs had wings.. they’d surely be delicious..

Welcome To Gilead

i saw Kate Moss  +her daughter  she of

half naked swaddle  in tulle  a babyghoul  preening

mom all fishyface  +cheekbone brutality


cheek implants require digging deep into the headcavity


more depravity at the Met Gala NYC   circa 2020’s

most of the women appeared footbound  a practice

in China where  feet of toddlergirls   bound


binding them to a life of cash+carry  like groceries  or beer


the sur real show was to leer  at cleavage so deep  no need

to peep  at giantess mammary goddesses  spilling out of

dresses  some in chainmail   Congratulations Met Gala !


just another form of binding  to the craze


for women to be sub-servants  just watch ’em topple

Roe v. Wade   Ruth BG  a cacophony  from the grave

at 98  my own mother’s beauty  unmarred by filler   or knife


abortions in alleyways  +death by hanger  in her day


(..”it will become ordinary” .. Aunt Lydia’s statement reflects the power of a totalitarian state like Gilead to transform a natural human response such as revulsion at an execution into “blankness,” to transform horror into normalcy.) 

Handmaid’s Tale  Margaret Atwood  1985 



Spring  2022   ..Happy Mother’s Day Babe! ..we’ve come a long way..

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