..but we cannot simply sit and stare at our wounds forever.. says Haruki Murakami
No?
why do i write my autofictional narrative/confessional prose poems?
all diatribe memoir-esq +rage always prone to hyper-vigilance +amygdala
hijack-ers especially re: bugs serial killers +narcissists (what’s the difference?)
they’ll eat you alive clean your slim bones dry dem bones dem bones dem
dry bones 1st 65 years in a rage last 7 in grief pandemic cancer maximus
a brother and old mother crept away +on+on+on now it’s rise up time
from perpetual fightflightfreeze un-Anna Karenina me the train already upon
her as she decided to rise does memoir try to pin down the un-pinnable? nail it
to a cross where it withers forever a relic mementomori
maybe the past shifts +transforms as we do how-what-who is remembered
maybe it’s all a mirage hallucination feverdream did big Paul Paladino exist?
a small time mobster from Buffalo circa 1968 did bovine Jackie Gaudaur?
(who should rot in hell)
how ’bout blacksonavitch? poodle extraordinaire he who spoke 5 languages
held my hand in the night when parents cussed+squealed +wild animals entered
the suburban backsplit made off with my 1st husband and where now Difranco?
frogman in the Great War dance teacher gigolo your family reads like a
broadway play! said my de mentor who was not fond of over-rhyme his
own father in a ward mother married the handyman who beat her
..my father is frothing at the mouth..his hair is disarranged..his eyes crackle
like electrical storms..his fly bursts..his cock emerges huge+wet as a wriggling fish..
my father was a classics specialist and died from a torn heart when i was 9 1/2..
(David Donnell Water Street Days 1989 Governor General’s Award for poetry 1983)
Haruki Murakami these wounds
+their perps seem to have one helluva
staying-power
which is my hand?
which is hers?
__
Fall 2025 ..at 92 Rhonda who killed her rabbi husband against a fence..
perpetually begged for a bowl of her mother’s soup.. (true story inmate #666
Living Life on the Avenue a now defunct hellhole mirage)
songanddancegirl 