songanddancegirl

smells like quaint

yet another trip to quaint nirvana   this one

with 3 barber shops on main  does the hair of

the old grow faster  as in  the final seed crop?

grizzled seniors walk the line  many shuffle

or do the soft-shoe   tomorrow in walkers

dance pigs

i sit rockabilly+pantless  on a crisp fall day   locals

gawk   legs still bronzey from last winter’s vay cay

what am i looking for?

a good Mexican restaurant  culture to burn  an old

well hung poet  who gives good pillow talk   husband says

these men generally stink  ie., see Steve Earle  my last side hustle

i’m also looking for my old mother  escorted away last November

is there a side door out?  where all your dreams wait pristine  with

your dead   who dance as you come through    festering+genuflect

bye bitches

__

…will you look at the sky pig…behind this veil of gentleness+peace

night is charging +will burst upon us…pop!…that’s how it is on this

bitch of an earth…   (Pozzo  Waiting for Godot   Samuel Beckett)

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Fall  2023   ..i grow weary of this motif.. (Sam B.+me)

if it walks like a *pogrom…

Nazis were fond of using bayonets on Jewish babies  thrown

into the air   Hammazis use large swords  decapitation their

specialty  at one kibbutz alone  40 babies  litter the floor

what more do we really need to say about the propensity for

sadism  in the clothed ape?  and what of innocence?  mostly

treated as an entry point for pedophiles  +the endgame for   babyhunters

(we refer you to altar boys+girls  +infanticide)

as well  we are the only species  to spawn serial killers  likely

enough said   human atrocities span all epochs  this may be the

one case where throwing the baby out with the bathwater  is called for

and likely the first item on the to do list of our soon to be   AI overlords

clothing the naked ape  did not make a dent in the thinnest veneer of

civilization   if you really want to stand with Jews   don a yellow star

__

(on your back too ..as the Nazis made the Jews do ..so they can identify

you ..should you run)

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First weeks of  year 5784

*pogrom: an organized massacre of helpless people; 

specifically a massacre of Jews (Miriam Webster)

the un-peace train

last time on a train   i was holding your hand  always did

you were afraid  of most things  so i couldn’t be  of anything

except maybe  you

now alone  of the alone of the alone  barely resurrect  after your

last breath   trip in pope funeralmobile to cemetery    people

peering    what’s she wearing?  no not you    me!

wailed wolfen   now lonest-wolf   fuck off gawkers  hangers on

diddlers   2 hawks starboard  bigger than the ones  who came

for you

a caricature   oldpoetwoman on a train  in lulu+deconstructed

converse  bullybully   Frida Kahlo bag too   matches  GRL PWR

Frida tee    Frida rolling    holy  footsmashed+gangrene

i’m looking for a replacement  to stand in my stead   walk my streets

sit with pervs in park   daily   while i escape to quaint   with hacking

cough    +nervous covidstares everywhere

but hey  i made it onto the peace train  ohhhh ohhhh the peace train

hair elvis bouffant   escape my asssss    as you laugh  that all knowing

laugh     which sounds like a cross between

i told you so   and

if i had your looks+brains

i’d have married

a gazillionaire 💃🏻

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Fall 2023  ..not the original vagabond..nor an unwashed phenomenon..you’re thinking of Zimmerman..

freedom tastes like reality

another close call  as in  within inches of my life

this time an umbrella helicoptering  in a freak gust

of wind

we’re talking inches people  ditto the rock  (not him!)

near miss  last Saturday  annihilation squandered

yet again

on my way toward  the umbrella   strangely thinking

about a story  my newly dead mother told me  repeatedly

happened while she strutted down  an NYC street  circa 1943

pushed out of path  of a runaway tire  at 19  lived another  79 yrs

(now that’s mazel!)  some here too  yesterday lost a sparklyblue

sapphire bracelet    Swarovski

fall leaves everywhere  a blue elasticband  near severed head of

chickadee   i trod on+on  again fabulous mom’s words  ringing

it should be the most important thing you ever lose 

said re: wallets glasses pens virginity

the mist lifted  +there near purebreddoggie diarrhea  the bracelet

all dungbeetle+glinting   on the walk home reflecting  on her losses

the most important things    ever to lose

children breast husband homes parents sisters friends joie de vivre

she died naturally  mild infection sunrise jazz    +as i face a brand

new year  5784  with the freedom of being freshly orphaned   i sense

that she is  THE MOST IMPORTANT THING I HAVE EVER LOST

along with the last shreds of my immortality   i remember too  her

bottomless grief   for her mother   ditto me   bottomless  motherless

and free  ?

__

get married have kids come for dinner come for holidays cook clean cook

don’t go to school  be a slave  take the yoke   smile darn ya  smile

New Year  Fall 2023  ..now what?..

what a husband does in the woods stays in the woods

fuck the head swiftie for stealing my new bf  Travis Kelce

preceded by Alex Anzalone  of the blondemane   when it

comes to men   i am not deep

though i remain ardent re: a longstanding no creeps policy

husband #3 is decidedly  hunk  a lifetime forest ranger  tight

with Yogi    Boo Boo his favourite tentmate 🤟

apparently BB  intense bear-gastritis   husband briefly dated

boob’s sister-in-law Bruin Hilda  too   though he kept his huge

hands  off of Yogi’s  Cindybear   with the greatest of difficulty

he is definitely more simpatico with bearnakedladies

human girls too clean-shaven  brazilians make him gag  (!)

(perhaps tmi )

in any case Travis Kelce will tire of Taytay  as did John Meyer

he who opined:  she is one limpfishy dullbiscuit queenbitchy

but John sleeps and tells  he said of Anniston: old boringskunky  COUGAR

yessssss!!!

__

Fall 2023  ..let she who has never felt envy..cast the first stone..

my haggis lover

husband #3 had a dream  haggish+fatefucked

yes! there is such a thing  he dreamed of  Morta

she one of the 3 sister fates  who cut the thread

of life   +choose the manner of your demise

she carried a slingshot  +launched death orbs at

young girls  et al.  once she tossed a can at a  20

something  who had escaped the rock  instant death

ensued💥

she did this  because she could   playing with us little

humans  her grimgame  Morta  ghastly  gaseous  gnashing

fell in love with Scotty  sent a near-human fly to bite me

at the cemetery   where i visited my freshly dead mum

it took a chunk from behind my lame knee  decidedly heart

shaped  the scar now jagged through the centre   Morta ate

of the pink flesh  +thought me brisket-ey   NOT as much

of a treat   as he

brawny  will eat every cracker in the house  as crumbs catapult

driving home from longish holiday  in homogeneously white

Ontario town   Morta raised her sling  she wanted rid  of me    rude bitch

then to sink her teeth into  scotchmorsel  he didn’t skip

a beat  drove sturdy  missing transport splatt by inches

the rock hit the windshield  my side    NOT today Morta

i want more of my sweet wife’s  decrepitude

today i sit under a giant tree  +wonder if it is the type

dropping thick trunks onto hipster heads  in my local

park   and as i  contemplate my narrow escape  i decide

that i am    out of

shrivelled+shriven

in a lakeside Ontario town  where low camp was invented

selling 60 buck  crafty felt gloves  with appliqué   there is a

perm-a-cross in the sky

with the words  lest we forget  scrawled across the goodyear

blimp  people my age limp  weighted down by smores  +regret

i sense they want more

here an old goatyhipster  sidelong Tom Waits energy   i can see he

is slighted by my aloof  don’t step one inch closer to me  glare   your

filmy bedroom eyes tell me   you are in need of pulleys+pumps

the much touted art exhibit  at the 18th century church  POSTPONED!

fairytales+fantasies  miniatures for the cancelled  (seriously)   i am told

that the artist suffered a tragic death in her family

by a woman with  a red lip  +yellowing wig   now i sip coffee at the Dizzybird

Cafe  where the merch is all march-hare🐰   i would never live here  though a

rather longish visit   reminds me  that i am not dead    as yet

__

Fall 2023  ..need a cheerier vacation spot..🌻

gravedigger’s blues

grave all chewed up   scorched earth  demeanour grave

as i karate chop cemetery manager   a frail+dastardly

man-elf  who lies baldfaced  to the grief wracked +barely living

the dead have his number  my mother would have unminced

words for him  she of the truth   unvarnished   she would say

+particularly to those with delusions of grandeur   we were poor

my mother had a

grocery store  

we lived upstairs 

and we always had food

proud daughter of  a pokerplayer+tailor  Jewish quarter Montreal

born 1924   her final cryptic-wisdom in the weeks leading up to

her death  at 98      i’ll tell him when he gets here 

he was coming for her  and she knew it  and she was fuckingfearless

he sang her songs  in the middle of the night  old standards from the

40’s   for this  we called a mediocre lady psychiatrist  who said:

your mother is deaf    (!)   i guess Benny Goodman at 4 am renders one

deaf   for this she attended  several universities  +taught at U of T    so

what did mother tell him when he got here?

and i quote:

you’re no match for me  you cowardly bastard  i dated the Ali Kahn

for chrissakes  sat with Sinatra in a choice booth at the El Morocco

how many times did you have to ring the doorbell at 4 am?

for this my kids nearly committed me!  

why you’re nothing but a 

2 bit door to door reaper  

and your voice    don’t ask !

__

Fall 2023  ..one year..rest easy mummybird ..🐦

the last cut is the deepest

they had 666 stitches between them  sewn

willynilly  into their skin  they wore their

crowns of thorns  with dignified aplomb

all 3 of them

father: they’re gonna cut me from stem to stern kids

martino: i was a q.b. this don’t frighten me  now get me

the fuck out of this bed

motherbird: if the bubba had balls she’d be the zaida  i was

too stupid to be afraid

NOT stupid  an innocent  like a captured bird  glamourpuss

in suburban deshabille  the 3 of them are my heroes  for their

bravery  in the face of  scalpelfrenzy

sometimes the cure is worse than the disease

glitch in heart-lung machinemonster 

curving scar breastbone to lumbar  armpit implicated

neo-bladderman rules the airwaves

And they rose up  without complaint  +lived to fight another

day   they stoked their fierce originality   for some 55 years

post-crucifixions      BRAVO

Summer 2023  ..Happy Anniversary Frances+Lee..without you..we’d be nothing👑👑

griefstew + fawns

i sit here stewing + grieving  sounds like a

morbid cooking show  cannedgrief  with a

side of stewed prunes  unblock those last

remnants of what is stuck

heartbloat gutwrench

guts not churning as much  but my dead peeps

are all around me  whispering  moving things

flashing lights   scaring the shit out of me

why not come in the front door?  sit down  take tea

sleep over    just don’t be dead  anymore   you can

do it!

this morning i reamed out the new cemetery guy

Jewish Mellors  sans the limp  your graves bedraggled

dry scorched earth  on the freshest mothergrave

i see beautiful lush greenery  at other cemeteries   i even

see  butterflies  fawns  leprechauns  i want a fucking refund

or i will be moving my peeps    posthaste

__

Summer 2023  ..i see trees of green..red roses too..