songanddancegirl

"It's about words, and words are all I have…"

dollface

 

life on the ravine  not all it was cracked

up to be  an idyll  with red sunsets  off of

western

facing

balcony

 

in a house where the family harboured

bankrobbers + whores  +gamblers

 

down the road  the forest turned blue  +

there lived my one truefriend  on a dead end

it was daddy who said she was a lesbian

 

ronnie shimmelstien studied ballet  +later pre-

raphaelite painting  we met in paris briefly  1983

she told me  sitting splayed on my bed  that:

 

while in law school at berkley

she

went

through

a windshield

 

her father flew her to boston  her face  now a

replica  with small incisions displayed  mapping

her pain  +self loathing  (my mother never loved me)

 

in her canopied room  shimmelstien  had a collection

of dolls  116 to be exact  beady eyes followed me  as i

gorged on white pistachios  ($$$)

 

it was in ’73 that her bubbie  was found in the ravine

clutching multiple dolls  +screaming   or was that my

cousin?

 

our childhood manor  full of savants

+vaunted

sales giants

heroes unt saints

__

 

Winter 2019/2020

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