i didn’t call him daddybird for nothing
at 7 i had the strongest desire to catch a bird father said:
take a dish towel +a salt shaker +sprinkle salt on its tail
u cannot imagine how close i came inching along on my
girlbelly
this bit of wisdom i found in a hassidic tale some 40 yrs. later
father a hassid! my ass what i caught was the desire to lay
quietly for lengthy periods in damp grass alone in zazen
bird-meditation waiting
and waiting is what father was really teaching me
no the squirrel who fell from the roof is not at the zoo little birdgirl yet i wait
maybe father somehow knew that one day i’d have waited 31 yrs.
+counting to see him it gets easier i guess not as hard as in
the first 90 days when bellycrawling doesn’t begin to describe it
waiting now too for the final 3rd to unfold where a bird in the hand
would be the rising particularly on the beach where father’s stallion
is known to graze + the light at the end of the tunnel is a pair of
greenish-blue eyes
__
u just wait
i will catch that bird
find that beach
Fall 2020 ..the old boss..father’s doppelgänger..
songanddancegirl 