songanddancegirl

did u ever have a sister?

losing a sibling versus losing a parent

we must be programmed  to lose our parents

as a biological imperative that is

think about it

we spend our entire lives trying to break away

from   our giants   as my child clients  called

them

it is in  those first moments  when u realize u can

control your hands  that you slap them away  or beat

them back   or hack off a hand    to be free

hey people  i can do it myself  +put a lock on the bathroom door   fer chrissakes!

but siblings  they’re an entirely different story  sewn

into the fabric of your DNA   your cellmates  (one bro

mournful+captive  peering out behind bars of his crib)

poor caged little minkey

u cannot surgically remove them  like a bladder   it’s u+them

against  the giants   sink or swim   littermates are tattooed

no matter what  they do     to u

__

..did you ever have a sister?  did you?

no but they’re all bitches..

(William Faulkner  The Sound+The Fury  1929)

Summer  2020

is morphine vegan?

time shreds your wildest dreams  seems it flies  too

but sartre thinks our relations with time are all messed up

mostly he is impenetrable  some pearls though  in addition

to:  hell is other people  jean paul is certain that only the past

exists   existentially speaking  that is

every second  an evisceratedfuture shredded  so cancel your

membership to the spacetime continuum  opt out  do not check

the box  people    this will all take care of itself

+they have morphine!

__

..this unspeakable present, leaking at every seam..these memories,

these monstrous obsessions..one escapes from the temporal world

only through mystic ecstasies. A mystic is always a man who wishes

to forget something..TIME MUST BE FORGOTTEN..

(Jean Paul Sartre on William Faulkner ..1955) 

Summer 2020  ..when time went missing..🦇

o those bewitching bubbles

bubbles are a concept by which we measure our pain  safety

do bubbles really mitigate COVID 19?  probably not  yesterday

our 96 yr. old mother  in seclusion as a child  when fevers raged

clothes burned  +lonedoll immolated   let out of covidprison

for the day

recoiled from our touch  a touch deprivation of 5 months  leads

to  anomie  robotism  heartfissure-itis  we tried to convince her

masked  distanced  hollowed out   with a likely delirium  around

our edges

trust us!

we’re your covidteam! 🦇

mother wary  +ninety-six wise  looked askance  using words like

mishigah   when inspecting poet’s  covidombre   but it was my

declaration of a new found vegetarianism  that pushed her over

the ledge

she of meat + potatoes   players for 30 years   exercise   meh

the last one standing in her circle   +we of the imaginary  safetybubbles

huddle   succubus+beguiled   hey kids  bubbles can kill u!  then yer dead!

__

Summer of Glove  Summer of CovidLove  ☀️ ☠️☀️

the men of the covidsnitch line

the 1st person told me to call the 2nd

who suggested the 3rd  who said call

numero 4  who suggested 5+6   6 said 7

7 said 8   +8 said call #1  !!

existentialmasturbation  looking for mr. kafkabar

i hung up +vowed not to call 1  even if the

last man standing   mind u he was interested

in what kind of scotch i drink   and so begins

my covidtrajectory  into the vaunted halls of  service ontario

he sent me a selfie too  of his privates  which

look a lot like tom berenger’s   now covidderanged   i wait

__

Summer 2020  ☠️🦇☀️

them doggone days

my father was gorgeous  no  he really was

all girls think this  electra obviously did  +lisa too

lisa who?

simpson

presley

ok  u name a few

lee had me on a horse at 3  way before a bike  +he

trained me to deliver 26 puppies on a freezing

balcony  in we the north   in case he wasn’t home

and he wasn’t    home

put your fingers down their throats+pull the mucous sac out

that’s disgusting!  no way

do it   or they die

ok

now wet+frozen  i the chosen  one  hear them drop  from dilly

with a thwaak  onto icy planks  of the balcony  a rotting/swaying

harbinger  of family decay     west facing

go west!  young poodlecatcher  be fearless!  midwife your escape  *(still in progress)

greatest little filly of them all   he wrote   in grade 6  autograph book

aug 16  1968     and lee died  21 years to the day

so where was mother while 2 dozen puppies were writhing?

cleaning afterbirth  where else?   bloodmottled blue carpet   smiling

watching me  on the balcony   whispering

i wanna be u

i wanna be u

i wanna be  somebody

___

Summer 2020 🦇🦇☀️☀️

american dirty

apparently when angels walk among us they

have difficulty deciphering  if we are dead or

alive  that is likely because we do too

which other species has produced serial killers?   hands up

did u know that early americans kept slaves in

cages  in the woods  +raped them until dead

this is true

so the stain on america is:  uncle sam wants

your women  +children   he is a sadist  +executioner  by tree

bring me  your huddled masses  + i’ll piss on em

(lou reed  not me)

__

Summer 2020  ☠️☠️

hamlet who?

soon u won’t recognize me  +that’s okay

i have always dreamed of invisibility   my

hair beet-red fuckery  134.50 every 3 wks

now covid-ombre  silver  inch by filthy inch

as 70 looms  silver season  of the witch

broomstick ready  bitch  but covid steady

decimating  texas  arizona  soon california

oh  +15,000 cases in florida   in one day

80,000  across the greatest country on earth

just yesterday   who will be left standing?  the

dishevelled bible thumper+his mail-order bride?

something is rotten  in denmark too   to be  or  

not to be  has taken on new meaning  as hamlet

lies unventilated  +shivering

__

Welcome to Summer 2020

power to the (gloved) people

as i grabbed her gloved hand   the guard

shouted  NO!  +administered a blow  to my neck

mother promptly kicked her where it counts   i

recount this cautionary tale as the covidoutlaw

stalks our environs🦇

virusmortis

moribundus

enough said

my sister shouted   NO GLOVE!  NO LOVE!   as

the guard+nurse squirted epithets   +they were

not as pretty   as she is  👸

__

Summer of Glove  ..🖤🦇✊🏻✊🏿✊🏾✊

amazinggrace

i

am

not

not

going to make

it   (everyone thinks they’re gonna make it)  (until  they don’t)

a bro said: he escaped living ten  fifteen yrs.  in one of those places

ya  but his checkout was graceless    or was it?   NOT

amazinggrace  fulness  danced like a butterfly  stung like a scalpel

he’d want to have long convos  about what all the oldmen in mexico

had for lunch   shrimp the size of your arm!

2 fer 1 tacos  the size of a  bladder  man   lunch was only 2 bucks  2 bucks!

no mazel   but then luck  she’s a finicky bitch      bitches

__

..did you ever have a sister  did you

no  but they’re all bitches..  

(William Faulkner  The Sound+The Fury  1929)

Summer ☀️ 2020    ..how sweet the sound..

old bob meet dead walt

zimmerman found 202 words to rhyme with multitudes    (jew was not one of them)

this in his latest album  tho back in ’62 he couldn’t come

up with one for orange (!)  can u?   but hey  if yer gonna

rip off walt whitman   j’accuse!

mind u  u did give us  in the jingle jangle morning  +that is

way deep  but jesting aside  u with the profile of a russian

rabbinical scholar  +the hair of a girl jewbu

u  mystical transmutation of woody  who penned a song

about orange don’s dad  a white supremacist extraordinaire

u  of the gravel+tobacco voice

stick around song+danceman!   the multitudes can’t breathe

and the orange scourge contains the worst of yer american multitudes

__

has anyone supposed it lucky to be born?

i hasten to inform him or her it is just as lucky to die

i am not contained between my hat and boots  

..i contain multitudes..

(Walt Whitman  Leaves Of Grass  1855) 

Summer of the Sunking☀️☀️  ..long may u run old mr. zimmy.. (morange !!)