songanddancegirl

frogs boils neighbours locusts

it’s about the frogs  he said  the neighbourboy  written up

in the paper on saturday  now a billionaire developer in bed

with DiNiro  an investor in Canada’s first Nobu  a grifter niece’s

favourite resto

but back to Guillermo   he was dimwitted as a boy  and i could

make him eat dog shit   i didn’t  but i could have  he later lied

on his med school personal statement   +didn’t get in

touting imaginal hardships  like the time our poodle ripped

every hair out of their maid’s head   his mother  a crass jaguar

driving bitch   once pushed me to the ground   hard   i was 5

her moustachioed daughter had followed me down a laneway

to the frog graveyard   frogs decapitated   splattered entrails

surprisingly ungreen

this family watched us eat  through our window  across from their

toilet   where we once heard the father shrieking   as his sphincter

which was quite tight   finally opened

it is doubtful DiNiro

has been apprised

of this

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Spring 2021

he shot a man in reno

my child client:

would you still love me if i

murdered someone?

yes

and i would help you

understand why

and try

to make sure it doesn’t  happen again

when you get out of prison

reflecting on the apocrypha  of a life

now lived in  facebookcrevice  where

70 something cretins  wax poetic on:  my bros life

he was the original king kondo  he started a fund for 

shot students after kent state  became the UN raconteur

on mass shootings    all the while impish grin glinting

selfmade

selfdecayed

with a side of selficide

but  the stories still trickle in

i saw him ball 5 chicks   at once  

envy-pyres

some liars   too

all glamping in your glory

run with it bro

now sprung from

starfuck prison

__

Spring 2021  .. for M.A. ..75 in 3 weeks..RIP..

will u still feed me? will u still need me?

did u know there’s a run on wills?  my lawyer

broke this to me on the eve of my 64th birthday

after a harangue about his mother’s dead friends

he said:  there’s a 3 month waiting list

that is tantamount to saying:  call me if you die

and i will

everynight

from the grave

__

Spring 2021

not recommended reading🚫

i have 3 times told the living  they are dying

why is there so much fear here?  contamination

by the stench?  smell that smell?  or is it   witness protection?

i mean cancer isn’t smallpox  or is it?   Tolstoy writes

of the lie  in Ivan Ilyich   no one will tell the dying man  that

he is  dying   but when u do   they let go   u know

probably u do not

but i do   and i do not consider the skill   hero   hell no

it came to me  unbidden  unloved  unkempt too   death

the primal exit of sacred substances   ain’t pretty

blood   fecal   ruach   et al.

(unless they vacuum them post-haste)

that skill just showed up  like the pox or the plague  or God

u know when God shows up  it usually spells trouble  like old

Kronos eating his kids  do mother Gods eat their kids too?

some do

some humans

do too

__

Cancer ridden Ivan Ilyich  to his doctor:

won’t you ever be ashamed of your lying?  but

the cheerful doctor does not wish to understand

such a question.. (The Death of Ivan Ilyich  Leo Tolstoy 1886)

Spring 2021   ..gestation your 1st tentacle.. lying doctors your last..

apeocalypse now

the apocalypse of ape  seriously

aging family of concern   aging ape    but wait!

whales are gathering at the edges now  spouting+spuming mobys

as variants rage  stress cuts holes deep into the ur-terior   and this is not good

as i plead with them  not to take my old mother  to that other gulag   on bathurst

they rub oily hands together   and stare at me  with fishyeyes   (gator’s got yer granny)

what’s the date ape?  (omg the date?!)

what’s the time ape    (this is sounding a lot like little red riding hood)

you may be entitled to 15 years post-escape   should you grow a pair    ape

otherwise they wait  in lairs decorated with  Prada+Chanel  +some sailors

the last temptations of ape   social worker named piggy   teeth aglinting

says: the better to eat u with my dear  (neardead)  little poetmorsel

CHOMPCHOMP

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Spring 2021

uncomfortably numb

i was born too alive     way too

do u even know what this means?

giantitus of the senses   gulping  choking  vomiting   beauty

sweetjesus  that’s bad  save me from  sensory overlord

Fritz Perls   father of  Gestalt Therapy©️  said:  lose your mind  

and come to your senses   u loafers of the soul  

this for the halfalives  semi-brain dead  mindfulness meditators

go suck a blueberry until yer blue in the face  you are a race

frozen to sensation   lust is not yer middle name

woe though  i have recently come to know  how u  don’t  feel

my alive is dead-inside    it’s a long story   but i did hear a retort

as the social worker  brandishing an M16   offered my 100 yr. old    mother

the:

choice suite in palliative

just because she’s pretty

__

Spring 2021  ..it hurts to be pretty..

a key teaching of F. Atkins circa 1965

brown eyed crone

the thing about grey hair is  u join a club  instantly  and u are not

a joiner of clubs  while u might still be a brown eyed girl   no one

really cares  what colour your hair  when balling u behind a stadium

(silverlining of cronehood)

u are now someone who  isn’t just called m’am  but  goodlookin cougar      (ouchhhh)

by wayward men in alleyways   said men siddle up  +through toothless

smiles  ask if they might drool on your fadingstarlight    sure  why not?

this transformation also leads  to being slipped the answer  by

hungry sailors  +players  hopefully pre 65   but back when u were

25   there was a charlatan  with a chicken to pet  around every corner

good example: a biz acquaintance of a bro with 2 planes  hounded u

for a date  back in ’83   he was gnomish  with zillions  he said: a woman

like you  i’d take to the opera  in Prague!    (send a chopper  now)

i fled from the sad breakfast he’d prepared   +rheumy fingers

touching thighs    joe    joe      u still alive?

__

SPRING 2021

glad i’m jung + not a jungian*

if u tell a jungian yer pregnant  they take it

as a metaphor  for?  I’m full of life  rife with life

gestating the Godhead ? 

a weird crew  but also the most open +limpid

bunch u ever want to meet  my young nephew

dragged to a jungian lecture  Montreal 2015ish

marvelled:

they’re so weird ape    ya sonnyboy  cultish vulcans  

+he’s a filmmaker  watch out world    one woman  eccentric

+a tad creepy  said often: what’s a Self??  in a high pitched   tremelo

but WTFDIK  u figure it out  which in jungian terms means:

go grapple with yer grandmother’s shadow   sounds like fun

but not if my grandmother is yours

__

Winter 2021  ..*C.G. Jung on his sycophants..

swing low + carry me home

i imagine it has occurred to some of u that

u are  actually  dead  and this the un-great

Purgatorio  much vaunted by Dante Alighieri

so  who knows more about death  italians or jews?

or perhaps the ruskies do?  (is that pc?!)  here’s

a quote from dead Leo Tolstoy   u decide

..whirlwinds of snow circled about the dead Vasili’s head

he remembered his money, his shop, his buying and selling

and it was hard for him to imagine why the man called Vasili

had troubled himself with all those things

well it’s because he didn’t know what the  real thing  was!

dead vasili felt himself free  and nothing  could hold him back

i know for sure ..now i know!  and his whole being was filled

with joy..    (Master and Man 1895)

doesn’t that sound a lot like u and me?  now in the 2nd year of

this covidreality  and if we are still alive  maybe we’re in the real

life version  of Scrooge’s dream  vaccines  turkeys for all turkeys

by 2023 !

so just lie back and enjoy it

not pc either  but it will do

___

Winter 2021  🦇🔅🦇🔅

vagabond troubadour rises

how many of u have been glued to your final dream?

c’mon  u can tell me

well  mine is fading rapidly  as husband crunches numbers

incessantly   the bones of dinodream   grist for the mill

now a colourful chowder-like substance   (dream involves sailors fishermen +clams)

don’t get me started   lighthouses   +pirates

pirateddreams   like when a child client poked me hard

with Captain Hook’s  hook  (pg. 28 in my book)  why on earth did i buy that thing?!

hey  it’s hard enough to crank out a dream in a covidfugue

so   HANDS OFF!    pinched stoics

i’m through

the NW passage

trolling for will

on the Beaufort sea

__

Winter  2021 ..seeking gold and glory, leaving weathered, broken bones.. i will take the NW passage alone..