songanddancegirl

a room at the top

my first age spot  perfect circle   unmistakable sign

of the slide  to the otherside   on a more positive note

at least it’s not a liver spot  remember those?

my parent’s friends had them  one in particular  Bill  (no one kinder)

giant crop circles of pallid brown  alcohol +henpeck

even Bill’s dog was crazed  +not in a happyway

his dog ran in circles  not only that  but Sammy D. jr. would

re-circle the same circle  twice   moral of story: life is a bitch

series of vicious circles  of your OWN making  (ie.. Bill’s 2nd wife

locked Bill in a back room)

WAR IS OVER IF YOU WANT IT !!

hey  there is no padlock on the prison of your mind

there NEVER was  you’re just too busy shining klieglights

on the past to be able to sink into the everpresentpresent

the one dying at the same rate as you

__

Winter 2022 (live dammit live! ..doesn’t begin to cover it..)

who u calling old?

they sent me a letter  appalling+gibberish

full of tips for the aged  +fetid

how to:

take medication

get exercise

love

do the aged love?  do the fetid?

inevitable+flab  creaking  but not stupid  Mr. Gov’t

same government who allowed mayhemists free reign

+lodging in our capitol city  only the best for our terrorists

and they’re telling me  how to take medication?

__

Winter 2022  ..live dammit..live..

no guru

there are so many gurus now  take podcasts

for instance  (please take them)  deep wells

of  blah  blah   fall in  and there u will find   mad trolls

gone mad

from podpeople

circle jerks

said trolls  should u be on a meditation-pod

will drag u back to the  here+now  which u

are told ad nauseam  is the place to be

unless u live in a place where terrorists kidnap

girls at play  how about popping back  into gunfire

landmines  et al

or into Canada  the sound of sedition  honking

inside those 500 trucks  hunker populists  pressed close

to our parliament buildings

with bombs ?

AK-47’s ?

and young children

asleep on damp mats     (soon to be taken away)

__

Winter 2022  ..when human respect is disintegratin’..

el silencio es oro jérry

i have developed an aversion to the GPS lady

who speaks in eurotrash subliminals   yesterday

on the way  to a too long movie  i will swear she

called me

slut

recently she directed us

into the belly of the beast

and we are still  trapped there   slut!

__

Winter 2022  ..enough already with the Spanish flu equivalencies..

endemic my assssssssss!

hands up if u are jumpingforfucking joy

since they declared the pestilence  endemic

drop the  d   switch the  ic  for an  a   and

you get what they are giving us

we the festering herd

whose leaders turned off

the globalviruswarning system

who went to wine+cheesers

(for work purposes)

who lied thru their teeth

so frequently  that death

has been declared meaningless

hey  yer virtually immortal   fer chrissakes

take off yer masks!

cavort in crowded places!

with all the shitty herdies

who spat at your feet on city sidewalks

who hoarded asswipe ad nauseam

who told u about their lunches in Puglia

as u stood in wind+bonefreeze

go!  sidle up to the unwashed antis  the

scent of whom  could knock   a buzzard off

__

..if from that interior place u heard a voice

say:  a shit wagon  u have smelled that smell..

Winter 2022  ..what pandemic?..

quo vadis vadis vadis

she’s in lockdown yet again

in 80 days  she turns 99

i think she may be afraid

of

the sky

going

going

going

gone

__

Winter 2022  ..we are breathing each other..all the time..literally..🦇Seline Selassie

breakfast of bachelor

Mahler ended  +i heard someone speaking

in a tortured cadence  the speaker on the wall

crackled   with eviscerate +desperation

a barely audible  i can’t  i can’t   filled the dark room

this my husbands’s 2 o’ clock session   on zoom

his therapy practice  filled  a long waitlist  looms

as the final variant of corona  sits behind the scrim

now plucking the bespectacled bachelor   one leg

stumplike +blue

__

Winter 2022  ..5th wave eh..🔅🦇🔅

Mollie can u hear me?

Mollie Onrot at 30  journeyed to  Antwerp from Poland

to Quebec City  from Antwerp  to the Ward   in Toronto

from Quebec City

with 4 little girls under 8

June 1910

my grandmother was the eldest  12 days on the frigid

North Atlantic  waves crash over side of ship   women

separated  from men

little girls  slip slide   ship careens   girls scream

cold+wet   fanny pearl beckie annie

where is Mollie’s husband?  horse trading below   Mollie

cancer dead at 39   one more child   a son   another wife

soon found   my grandmother never uttered  her name

said the Mayo  couldn’t save her mother

Fanny married off   at 18

nor could she be saved  from cancered brain   i’ve never

moved from my birth city  how hard can it be?  Mollie can u

hear me?

__

..and Yes  I said Yes  I will Yes..

(Molly Bloom  Ulysses James Joyce  1922)

__

Winter 2022    ..for chrissakes  get on a plane..

**what really happened

with one bare hand  i lifted a boy

who weighed almost as much as  me

from the tallest tree in our vicinity

hands up if u know who helped me?

__

(*addendum to Spence Spence)

Spence Spence

he had designs on my elevenyearold  body

Mr. Spence  perv+lurchlike  greasy greasy  hair

no Elvis    just plain ugly

he’s dead now  had me on his lap  at his big brass  desk

i was blossom+pre-skank   as the initiated know  11 yr. old  girls

reek of pheromones

he stopped short of full-blown virginsacrifice  he’d

met my father who resembled a linebacker   i suppose

Spence Spence  preyed more fully on the  unprotected   dejected

the ones who would later be my child clients  in the

temenos of pain   it was also in that year  i saved a

brother’s life   as he hung  from a tree  by his hoodie

had Spence touched me  i’d have shived him  with the

very same knife i used  to cut my brother  out of a tree

shrieking  like a girl banshee

__

..it was she who seduced me..

(Humbert Humbert  Lolita  1955)

Last Day of 2021   ..goodfuckingriddance..